3 Years Ago
There were only two things that could wake me up from my slumber. Flea's bass on 'Around The World' cranked up to the maximum, with a 1000 watt speaker next to my ear. The other would be the sound of her melodious voice whispering sweet nothings in my ear. How things change! Now the only thing that wakes me up is the prison warden, screaming at the top of his voice and the guards banging on the steel bars.
I find myself looking through the window, at the outside world, passing by, while I'm stuck, stuck not just within these four walls, but in a prison of my own. I've withdrawn into myself. I've barely uttered a word in over a year. The inmates ignore me, and the guards find me innocuous. I've had no visitors, because no one knows I'm here.
She must think I'm a spineless jerk to have left her. I never told her I was in prison. I couldn't let her know.It would've been too much for her. It has been exactly six months since that fateful day.
I was flying down the road at 100, each bump flinging the car a few feet in the air. The top was stuck, leaving me battling the rain, which lashed away at my face. The phone started ringing. I could barely make out the sound against the backdrop of the rain hitting the bonnet. It was her. I said I would be there in five. Just as I put the phone on the dashboard, out of nowhere, the boy appeared. I stepped on the brakes, and swerved, but it was too late. Everything went dark before my eyes. I had that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. I knew things would never be same again. I saw the fear in the boy's eyes. The innocence was lost and replaced by a raw fear, that left him paralyzed.
His eyes flashed before me, again and again. All I could remember were those eyes. I was never the same again. Every second, every minute, I replayed the events in my head. Regretting every moment since then, I've had a recurring nightmare, where I find myself in a dark place, so dark, I can't even see my hand in front of my face. Is this real? Am I dreaming? I feel around in the dark, only to find walls all around me. The walls are closing in on me. I can barely move. I try to push against it. Suddenly, there's a gush of water. Its pouring down from above. I can feel the water on my face. It's getting too much. I can't breathe. I start taking deep breaths, as the water starts getting cold. I can't move my face away from the water.....and then I wake drenched in sweat.
Today was no different, with me waking up with a startle. I carried on with the daily routine, when the guard comes upto me and says that I have a visitor. This left me a bit uneasy, as no one knew I was here. Who could it be? I asked him if he was sure and he responded with a 'Do you think I'm an idiot?' stare.
I walked into the visitors room and there she stood before me, as beautiful as the day I first met her. My stern expression gave way to guilt and remorse. I couldn't look her in the eye. We sat there for over ten minutes, without a word being spoken.
She began,
"Its been 2 years".
"I know".
"You've put me through hell".
"I know, I couldn't let you know".
"I'm leaving you. Don't ever try to find me".
She stood up, and walked away. I sat there, speechless. I didn't know what to say.
My world just got smaller.
to be contd....
There were only two things that could wake me up from my slumber. Flea's bass on 'Around The World' cranked up to the maximum, with a 1000 watt speaker next to my ear. The other would be the sound of her melodious voice whispering sweet nothings in my ear. How things change! Now the only thing that wakes me up is the prison warden, screaming at the top of his voice and the guards banging on the steel bars.
I find myself looking through the window, at the outside world, passing by, while I'm stuck, stuck not just within these four walls, but in a prison of my own. I've withdrawn into myself. I've barely uttered a word in over a year. The inmates ignore me, and the guards find me innocuous. I've had no visitors, because no one knows I'm here.
She must think I'm a spineless jerk to have left her. I never told her I was in prison. I couldn't let her know.It would've been too much for her. It has been exactly six months since that fateful day.
I was flying down the road at 100, each bump flinging the car a few feet in the air. The top was stuck, leaving me battling the rain, which lashed away at my face. The phone started ringing. I could barely make out the sound against the backdrop of the rain hitting the bonnet. It was her. I said I would be there in five. Just as I put the phone on the dashboard, out of nowhere, the boy appeared. I stepped on the brakes, and swerved, but it was too late. Everything went dark before my eyes. I had that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. I knew things would never be same again. I saw the fear in the boy's eyes. The innocence was lost and replaced by a raw fear, that left him paralyzed.
His eyes flashed before me, again and again. All I could remember were those eyes. I was never the same again. Every second, every minute, I replayed the events in my head. Regretting every moment since then, I've had a recurring nightmare, where I find myself in a dark place, so dark, I can't even see my hand in front of my face. Is this real? Am I dreaming? I feel around in the dark, only to find walls all around me. The walls are closing in on me. I can barely move. I try to push against it. Suddenly, there's a gush of water. Its pouring down from above. I can feel the water on my face. It's getting too much. I can't breathe. I start taking deep breaths, as the water starts getting cold. I can't move my face away from the water.....and then I wake drenched in sweat.
Today was no different, with me waking up with a startle. I carried on with the daily routine, when the guard comes upto me and says that I have a visitor. This left me a bit uneasy, as no one knew I was here. Who could it be? I asked him if he was sure and he responded with a 'Do you think I'm an idiot?' stare.
I walked into the visitors room and there she stood before me, as beautiful as the day I first met her. My stern expression gave way to guilt and remorse. I couldn't look her in the eye. We sat there for over ten minutes, without a word being spoken.
She began,
"Its been 2 years".
"I know".
"You've put me through hell".
"I know, I couldn't let you know".
"I'm leaving you. Don't ever try to find me".
She stood up, and walked away. I sat there, speechless. I didn't know what to say.
My world just got smaller.
to be contd....
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